Plain Jane

My Summer Resolutions:

-Walk the rat daily
-Help my mom with supper/dishes (sometimes)
-Join a club
-Lose body fat (whether I lose or gain weight)
-Find a hobby
-Eat less
-Scare Plain Jane

Who’s Plain Jane you ask?
Well, there’s another dog walker in the area who isn’t 80+ years old and I’ve decided to call her Plain Jane. She’s been walking past my house on the sidewalk, in front of my living room window in the mornings. I can’t tell how old she is because she likes to keep herself covered up with big baggy clothes and everything about her is kind of plain, nothing stands out.

If I was asked by a forensic sketch artist to describe her I would say “she was a girl, I think, with not-short but not-long hair, not brown hair but not blonde either, in a low ponytail. Of unknown build, hidden beneath baggy, non-brand-name clothes, so boring that I cannot recall the colour or style of them.”
There is one discriminating feature though, her awesome DOG! Its a Siberian Husky with ice-blue eyes, and a beautiful thick soft coat of fur, a strong and magnificent dog, everything a dog should be.

If I had that dog I would walk it proudly, head held high. Plain Jane sneaks around the neighbourhood with her amazing dog like its a crime. Sometimes she walks her dog with her eyes closed. What? Yes, with her eyes closed like she’s trying to let her dog lead her, so she’s bound to run into something, like a pedestrian. I’m going to hide behind a tree and then step out in front of her.  Then I will say “were you walking with your eyes closed?” It will teach her a lesson while entertaining me at the same time!
Her dog might attack me. But to die at the teeth of such a magnificent dog would be an honourable death indeed.


2 thoughts on “Plain Jane

  1. Maybe she walks with her eyes closed because she’s blind and she’s walking her seeing eye dog.

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