the ‘slap-in-the-face’ reality version of Valentine’s night

I couldn’t write yesterday because a meteor exploded over Russia and hurt like over 1000 people. So it seemed disrespectful somehow to write a blog about what ‘really’ happened at the lame Valentine’s dance when the hot topic of conversation is an exploding meteor over Russia.

So now that I’ve paid my respects to this event, by mentioning it in my blog, I will tell you about Thursday night.

So I never actually met DC, but imagining our first meeting is something I do quite often. Like I said, I’m an introvert, so I make up a lot of alternate realities in my head. Sometimes I honestly confuse an imaginary memory with a real one! Especially conversations cuz I make up a lot of conversations that I would have with people, that never actually happened.

okay here’s the ‘slap-in-the-face’ reality version of Valentine’s night:

So let’s see, well we can’t afford to buy me a new dress of course, THAT would never happen. My mom re-sized one of Vanessa’s pretty dresses she bought years ago at a second hand store. The dress was ripped and had a stain at the time, so my mom sewed it up nice and covered the stain with some fabric that looked like a flower (I think the exact same thing happened in an 80’s movie once). My mom was working as fast as she could to take-in the dress so it would fit me well, and I was waiting in my room. So I started daydreaming to pass the time, something I do when I’m stressed. And I was stressed. Not just about the dance but about DC not contacting me all day. We never just ditch each other, we’re seriously best friends, like he’ll do everything to contact me if something is off (except call on the phone). And I do the same. But he had disappeared. He knew how I wasn’t looking forward to going to the dance and I’d need emotional support to even show up. And so I decided to daydream that he had spent the entire day driving here with his mom and couldn’t get to a computer to message me.

And I guess if he has to have a secret flaw, the best one would be that he’s too young and doesn’t want me to know about it. And of course his mom and my mom would be friends (that works out really well doesn’t it? Like they met at a church scrapbooking retreat or something). But in reality he lives a million miles away, somewhere. He never said anything about living close by, etc. I just made that conversation up too. Sorry again (parts of that conversation were real, but don’t ask me now cuz I’ve confused it all).

So yeah, I was looking out the window, across to the donut shop while daydreaming and waiting for my dress to be finished, and that’s how I got the idea of DC meeting me there for the first time. I never got a donut and he never held the door for me. After my mom finished with the dress we went straight to the dance. My sisters were setting me up with some guy from another school (because every guy in my school has given up trying to get to know me). I’m not ugly. I just want to stay in my shell and not come out of it thank you very much. There’s nothing wrong with having a shell, turtles have shells and they function quite nicely. My sisters think I’m missing out on some of the best years of my life. But I don’t see it that way. I have the best time EVER with DC, I don’t think it should matter that our fun is online and not in real life. What is real life anyway? Its not like chatting is ‘sureal’, real people have conversations on line you know, but anyway.

So the guy at the dance was nice looking, probably what most girls would call handsome. But I wasn’t really into his whole ‘look’. And I was wondering all evening why DC hadn’t contacted me. I was polite and everything to Rodney, or Roland, I dunno, and I even saw a girl from my own school who talked with me for a bit (her grandma dragged her out). She would probably say we are friends, but I say we’re just barely acquaintances.

I suppose I kept zoning out and not paying attention when Rodney was talking to me, because he asked me if I was okay. I apologized and told him I’d probably go home early. Then I sat on this round bench thing at the front area of the building, and finished my story in my head (that DC met me there) while waiting for my mom to come pick me up. I didn’t actually say anything about being sick but I guess the news spread to my sister via Rodney and then she told my mom and my mom called me on my cell phone to ask me if I wanted to go home. I think she thought I was having a relapse into that flu I just got over not long ago.

So home I went.

I’m a firm believer in the idea that life is NOT as interesting as fiction. I mean for the average person, like me. Not to say I don’t like my life. I like my family and school. I don’t have much of a romance-life but that’s because I don’t find any of the guys I know (in person) interesting. DC is interesting. He is ‘real’, at some place somewhere, just not HERE in this city. Or at least I didn’t think so…

I’m glad reading week is next week and I don’t have to go to school for a week, cuz I don’t know if I’m ready to go back to school… or if I’ll ever be ready to go back to school… but more on that later.


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s